Boston College Announces Plans To Shut Down Hockey Program

Time to give someone else a chance
By Gerald Baldwin | 2014.08.12

Boston College has been a dominating force in men's college hockey for as far back as anyone can remember. Their five NCAA National Championships loom large over the other Hockey East teams and strike fear into opposing fans. However, all of that changed today when the prestigious school announced their plans to shut down Boston College Hockey. The plan is effective immediately, and could have devastating effects on the student body and the local economy.

"I'm really devastated," said one student. "Hockey was a big part of the school culture and pride, and now it's gone." Other students on campus shared the same sentiments, and planned to protest the decision by refusing to flush their toilets.

However, the school felt strongly that it was time to move on. The athletic program spokesperson read a statement to the press that explained, "We have kicked the other schools' asses enough at this point. It is time to give the other schools a chance at being as good as we are, without us getting in their way." He then dropped the mic and walked way.

It is almost unprecedented for a school to shut down a program with as much success as BC hockey. The void created by the beloved sport is likely to drive many students and fans into depression and a deep feeling of self-pity from which they will never recover; forever remembering the glory days as fond memories long passed.