The First Day Of School Is Cancelled In Your Town

Do your friends know yet?
By John Kimball | 2014.08.22

In a surprising announcement today from the school superintendent, it was decided that the first day of school was cancelled in your school district. The unexpected news is leaving parents scrambling for daycare coverage and has teachers grumbling about having teach another day further into the summer.

"I can't believe they are springing this on us so close to the start of the year," said Laura McKringle, a mother of two. "What am I supposed to do now? I can't arrange for a sitter, so I'm going to have to take the day off from work." However, not everyone was upset with the news.

"I didn't want to go to school anyways," explained a high school freshman who preferred to remain anonymous. He also explained that he needed the extra time to finish his summer reading, and this might help him get caught up.

As for the reason of the cancellation, no one is quite sure why the decision was made. Some students have theories that perhaps there was a scandal involving a teacher and a principal at one of the schools. Others have speculated that there was a last minute decision to install a pool on the top floor. Whatever the reason, be sure to spread the word so that your friends do not show up to an empty school on the first day.